What Are Feelings and How Do I Deal With Them?

On the walk home from class today I found myself walking in stride with a petite brunette with a Starbucks latte in one hand and a pink clad iPhone jammed between her shoulder and a faintly sweaty cheek. I mean, it was 90 degrees out and she was drinking a latte. I don't know what I was expecting.

For anyone who knows me, they would know that I have a serious eavesdropping problem. Honestly, if you ever hear me giggling out of context, just assume I heard something from across the room. It's not you, it's me. Sometimes when people pick up on this habit of mine, they find themselves playing along, making themselves a part of the joke. This not the point of the story. This girl was an innocent bystander of my wandering ear.

As I listened to her casually chat with a friend on the other end of the line, I realized she was talking about a guy, someone in a class that she was friendly with but not too friendly. It made sense. We only started classes last week. It would be strange if she were already too friendly with him (although, it wouldn't be the first time that had happened).

"I mean it's not like I have feelings for him or anything but he's great and he's a good friend."

That one sentence was my main takeaway from the encounter. It has stuck with me all day  and the reason  being, I had never thought about the act of having feelings for someone until I heard her say that. Since when did it become a thing that you can only have feelings for someone if you have a crush on them? Aren't feelings linked to emotions which we all experience?

I hate fish. So I have negative feelings towards sushi.
I think my best friend is an amazing person. So I have feelings of adoration towards her.
I'm not currently in a fight with my little brother. So I have feelings of love towards that little punk.

If you truly believe that someone is a good friend, you clearly already have feelings for them. It may just be feelings you don't immediately think of like trust and security and honesty and contentment.

So next time you ask yourself if you have feelings for someone, say, "Yes, clearly I do have feelings for this person. How silly of me".

Then immediately revise your statement and ask yourself if kissing seems imperative because that seems to be the only foolproof test on the market these days.