I've discovered that I may have minor self control problems because I'm halfway done with a sewing project that was supposed to be nice and relaxing and take me about a week.
Anyways, I want to tell you a story. It's a story I have been told multiple times before and I thought I knew well. I was wrong.
So, my grandparents both smoked for a good portion of their lives.
My mom assumes that my grandmother stopped around the time she had kids because she can recall photographs of her with a cigarette in hand but she has no actual memories of that happening.
My grandfather tried multiple times to give up the habit but always came back to it in the end.
When my mom was 24 and pregnant with me (the first grandchild), she met my grandfather for lunch in South Boston.
He casually remarked that he was going to gain a lot of weight and obviously confused, my mother questioned him about why he thought that.
"Well," he said, "I gave up smoking. For the baby."
Now from here on, my mother just grumbled about how he couldn't be bothered to give up smoking when she was born but instead, did it for me.
I however, was turned away from her, partially in tears.
You see, sometimes it's easy to feel like your family forgets to care about you sometimes. I only see my grandfather once or twice a year and when we talk, it's hard to think of things to say but he gave up smoking for me. I think I should stop doubting his love.
This moved me....keep writing, Jaclyn. Keep being you.
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